When One Falters
by xbrokensilence
Summary: It was strange of him to consider that Orihara Izaya could possibly discard of him. He didn't want to think like that, but Kida Masaomi knew all to well that this was easily a possibility, when he was just a pawn in Orihara's sick games. TWOSHOT!


**Pairing: IzayaxKida (Kizaya)**

**Rating: NC-17, M**

**Warnings: YAOI, underage sex, BOYxBOY**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Durarara!, Kida, Izaya, or Junjou Romantica. If I did... THINGS WOULD BE VERY DIFFERENT. oAo**

**I know I need to get chapter three of 'Enjoy the Silence' up, but I'm just NOT INSPIRED right now. e3e Soon, I promise. OH. And the next part of this, will be up this week. I can _assure you _of that. The only reason I'm uploading right now... is because I feel like I owe y'all something. ;-; Well, I hope you like part 1 of 2. :'D**

**Oh ~ And this is dedicated to my friend Daphne from YouTube. She's my absolute soulmate. *A***

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"-And, and, she's been skipping out on me lately!" The teenage boy whined. Kida Masaomi, who was sitting at the desk which the boy was spazzing around, sighed. He saw no real reason for him to be at school, learning things that he knew he'd never have to bother with in his future. For he knew his future. And it _definitely_ did not involve the theory of relativity, or the square root of a thousand. He had bigger plans. Plans he never would have considered without meeting a certain, _devil_.

"Kida!" His friend's hands slapped down onto his desk, and he brought his face close to the others. "Are you even listening to me?" Kida spat in his face, and leaned his head on his hand, an extremely bored look on his face.

"Masaya, why should I care about your girlfriend problems?" He shook his head, hoping his blond locks would move over his eyes, so that Masaya would understand that he didn't want to be talked to.

"Kiiiiidaaaaa!" Masaya just plopped his head onto Kida's desk. "I'm asking you, because you have so much experience! Please help!" His hands were now above his head, praying.

Kida just looked the other way. "Hn. I can't help you with that."

"Come on dude! Please just listen to my story!" But Kida didn't want to listen. He was tired of listening to his over-talkative friend, because his mind was trying to focus on other things. Well, one thing. Orihara Izaya.

_Orihara-san.. I hope he's doing well. Ah. I shouldn't worry about him. _His face softened. _He knows how to take care of himself.._

Kida Masaomi hated the fact that he was so useless in his relationship with the older man. Should he even call it a relationship? He knew that Orihara was just using him, but he could accept that. He loved the man. He wanted to be loved back, but he knew that wasn't an option. So he could settle with just being with the one he loved.

"-and then she doesn't even bother.. Hey Kida, are you listening?" Masaya grabbed Kida's ears and shook him, shaking all the thoughts of his older lover from his mind. "I really need your help man!"

Kida slammed his hands on the desk, jumping up. "Ok ok! Fine Masaya! I'll listen to your problems!" He sighed and drooped back down into his seat, grabbing the side of his head. "Damn. You're giving me a headache, idiot."

Masaya jumped off of Kida's desk, and squeezed the blond with all his might. "Ohhh thank you thank you thank you! You're my best friend, man!"

"Yeah yeah." Kida waved his friend off of him, and braced himself for the, knowing Masaya Ishiko, very long story that was bound to follow. And it was a long story indeed. Too long for Kida. About three minutes into the story of his problems with his girlfriend, Kida began wishing that his lunch period hadn't just started. Ishiko was one person he knew could talk for the full forty minutes of his lunch period without pausing to even take a breath. He sighed. _Damn it Mikado! You're not supposed to have to worry about your class representative duties during lunch!_

Even Sonohara Anri, his favorite _busty babe_, wasn't available, because of reasons he wasn't quite sure of, but he assumed it was also class representative duties. He wished he had his favorite companions with him, but he shook off that want and decided to tune into Ishiko's _dramatic _and _intense _story about his one true love. That's what he thought it was about, until he listened to what Ishiko was really saying.

"-and she seems to always expect me to start things between us. Never her! Just me!" Ishiko was ruffling his hair, due to his frustration.

"Wait wait wait. I don't get what the problem is here man." Kida leaned back in his seat.

"Dude!" Ishiko suddenly grabbed Kida's jacket and pulled him forward. "She's expecting me to do _everything _in this relationship! She doesn't understand that when all she does is stay still and take it, I start to get bored with her!"

As Kida was let go of, he sat back, and sank into his seat. _She just takes it... and he's getting bored?_ He pondered this, for quite some time.

"Ishiko.. what's so bad about you doing all the work? Don't you like that?"

"Dude, it'd be fine, if she at least bothered to take charge one time in our relationship. But she hasn't!" He threw his hands into the air. "I'm getting bored with the way she does nothing."

Kida winced. Was it just him, or was this all to familiar? This... was his relationship with Orihara Izaya to a 'T'. _Orihara-san.. won't get bored of me, will he?_

Ishiko was tuned out again. Too many thoughts were trying to be processed in Kida's mind, but only one would register. _He'll get bored of me..._

Lucky for Kida, but unlucky for Ishiko, the bell rang, which meant the end of lunch, and the end of lingering thoughts. Kida was headed to geometry, and hell, he knew there would be no time to think about this with the teacher he had.

But this turned out to be untrue. While he sat idly, trying to focus on learning whatever the hell it was that his teacher was talking about, he couldn't help but let his thoughts consume him.

_If Orihara-san is like Ishiko... No. Nobody is as shallow as Ishiko. It's gotta be just him that would get bored... right? _He rubbed his temples, feeling a headache creeping up on him. _Orihara san couldn't get bored of me. After all I- I love him! But.. he doesn't love me.. _Fear was also creeping up on Kida, and he was fully aware of it. _Orihara-san is a very cruel man... He could easily just be using me for his sick games, and be planning to kick me to the curb any day now.. Maybe I do bore him?_

A sudden thought hit him. _What if... I took charge?

* * *

_

As soon as the end of the school day bell rang, Kida was out the door and sprinting down the hallways. He was so consumed by his current mission, that he didn't realize that Mikado and Anri were trying to get his attention, until Mikado had yelled his name, which had caused him to trip down a stairway.

"Kida-kun! Are you alright?" Anri called worriedly, Mikado and her running to the spot where Kida was sprawled across the floor.

"I'm sorry I yelled your name so suddenly!" Kida noticed that Mikado was panting slightly. Running was still not his forte. He chuckled a bit, reminiscing of their past together, when he would challenge the black-haired boy to a race, just to watch him squirm. Kida sighed. _Was I always such a sadist..?_

With Mikado's hand stretched out toward him, he just couldn't help but embarrass the other in front of the girl that he liked. So he slowly took hold of the hand, then flung Mikado down and pounced on top of him, his fingertips gliding up and down the poor boy's sides. Kida and Mikado stayed like this for quite some time, with Anri just standing there, smiling to herself. Kida guessed she was thinking to herself something like "those two are such good friends." This caused him to smile. _I hope we can always stay like this._

Feeling as if Mikado had had enough, Kida swiftly jumped up from the floor, only to trip down again, over the bag Mikado owned that had _conveniently _landed in his path. He glanced at Mikado, who was just staring back at him, with his 'fake innocence' face.

"Kida-kun, Ryuugamine-kun," Anri chimed, reaching a hand in both their directions. "Don't you two think it's about time we head home?" Mikado stole a glance at Kida, who had done the same. They smiled at each other, then both got up off of the floor, with the kind girl's help of course.

Walking down the road that they all knew too familiarly, Kida began to lag behind the other two, observing their current situation. _Ah. Mikado's trying to be a player again to little Anri-chan~ _He sighed, this time, because of relief. He liked the way things were. In fact, he wouldn't change the way things were for anything.

"_Masaomi ~ Please do visit me soon.._"

Kida blinked. Orihara-san's words from the last time they had seen each other chimed in his head. Would today be their next encounter? He smiled. He wanted to see the red-eyed man again. But for some reason.. he didn't. Was it because he was nervous? Or was it because of what Ishiko had been ranting about earlier?

Kida walked in silence behind his two friends for a considerably long amount of time. He was glad that neither of them had noticed his silence, because there were many things he was pondering, and he didn't want to be distracted from his thoughts.

_Maybe I should try to take charge..._ He stopped in place. Was he seriously considering doing this? He felt almost crazy for even coming up with this plan in the first place. But.. he had to. He didn't want Orihara Izaya to get bored with him. Even though he wasn't sure if that would even happen, he didn't want to take any chances. He loved this man.

Another thought struck him. _Maybe if I initiate something... Orihara-san will think of me as more than __just a pawn. Maybe I could become important to him. Maybe him having sex with me would be out of love and passion, not lust and control.._

It was true that every time that they had had sex, Kida was the only one who could feel the passion. Orihara Izaya felt something that was similar, but was different. Lust. And while Kida couldn't take this, he would rather settle with it than not be near the man that captivated him so.

His love hadn't been love in the beginning. No, it had been far from that. When Kida had first met Orihara Izaya, he had indeed been a foolish and naive little kid, who created a gang because he had wanted some form of power, in his powerless world. Thus the Yellow Scarves were born. His gang quickly became a big influence in the city of Ikebukuro, which was probably one of the reasons Orihara had introduced himself to Kida.

Orihara Izaya was always the one who was pulling the strings. And he made everybody a pawn of his. Somehow, he just knew how to get into a person's head, and control them without physically controlling them. Kida shuddered, imagining Orihara's crooked grin. Every time Kida had seen that grin on his face, he had been filled with fear. And his fear slowly turned into a longing, as the man worked his way into the boy's life.

Always chuckling when they met, Orihara had easily rooted himself in Kida's mind, to a point where all he could think about was the man. The man with that crooked smile. That penetrating chuckle. That... devilish grin. Kida had quickly become obsessed, without even realizing so. He would frequently wonder why exactly it was that Orihara would go out of his way to meet with him. Some had warned him that he was just being used by the man, and that made sense in Kida's mind. Orihara Izaya was a man that liked to be in control, and of course, was. He understood why controlling him would be of great value to Orihara. Kida was a big part of Ikebukuro, with members of his gang spread all across the city. Kida understood all of this. But still, he...

"Uhm, Kida-kun.." Kida's head snapped up, seeing Anri and Mikado facing him, with concerned looks on their faces. "Are you feeling alright?"

_Time to turn on the charm, to get myself out of this mess. _Kida twirled himself around, before getting on one knee and taking Anri's hand. "Oh my dear Anri-chan! The fact that you worry about me, stirs the heart which Kida Masaomi has reserved for you and you only!"

As soon as Mikado saw Anri's face redden slightly, he jumped in between the two, breaking their contact. "K-Kida-kun! Stop joking around!" Mikado continued walking, obviously pouting, and Anri followed soon after, glancing between the two before she did. Mikado and Anri were a fair distance away, when they both turned around. "Kida-kun! Hurry up or we'll leave you behind!"

Kida was glad he had been given this opportunity to escape the two. "Miiikaaadooo! Aaanriii-chaaan!" He waved his hands frantically in the air. "I've got some business I need to attend to! So I'll see y'all tomorrowww!" And with that, he turned and ran off.

Mikado and Anri just exchanged glances, wondering what it was that he needed to take care of, but shrugged it off with ease and just kept walking. For the two did not know anything of what Kida was up to. Kida had sworn to himself that he would never tell them. He knew they wouldn't accept this. Nobody would. He barely did himself. But he just, couldn't help it.

* * *

Kida had bumped into many different people as he ran down the street, heading wherever it was that he was heading. All he knew was that if he was going to try and top Orihara Izaya, he'd need a little help. And where else could he get this kind of help from, than the library? He ran into the building but stopped dead in his tracks right at the entrance.

"W-Where am I supposed to look for this kind of stuff?" His faced flushed. "I guess I could look through some... boy's love... novels..." He trailed off, with the novel he wanted to find in mind. He felt like a complete fool as he entered the section with all of the homosexual books. _W-Why should I get so embarrassed? I'm... a homo too... _He tripped again, hitting into a bookshelf. A couple of books had fallen on him, and he found it quite strange that they had all been _Junjou Romantica _volumes. _Should I take this as a sign...?_

He quickly shook off the thought, and grabbed one of the volumes, quickly skimming over the illustrations, trying to find something that would help him. Kida almost threw the book out of his hands as he came across a sex scene. "You can do this Masaomi! You can do this.."

He sat in silence and slowly turned the page, before throwing it across the isle. "I can't do this!" Grabbing his head, he flailed around a bit. Clearly trying to find some materials to help him was not going to work. _Maybe I should just try to be spontaneous. Yeah! Just do what your gut tells you to do!_

Kida jumped up, a new goal set in his mind. He had to make it so that Orihara found him interesting. He had to become _something _in his love's eyes. And with that resolution, he exited the library and headed in the direction of Orihara Izaya's apartment.

* * *

Orihara Izaya sat in his chair, typing away on his computer. He could have been recording information, or disguising himself as _Kanra_ and deceiving the people in the chat which he logged onto daily. With Orihara Izaya, one could never know exactly what he was up to. But he knew what everyone else was up to. He knew what Kida Masaomi was up to also. In fact, he knew that Kida was standing on the other side of the door to his apartment at this very moment, contemplating whether or not he should enter.

His crooked grin grew. His favorite little toy had shown up at his door, of his own accord. It was turning out to be a very good day for the information broker indeed. Spinning once more in his chair, he leisurely stepped up and strode over to his kitchen cabinets, his famous fluffy coat fixed tightly to his form. He pulled out a few strange bottles from his closet, and grabbed a glass of tea, before dropping the contents of the bottles into the drink. He smirked. _Perfect._

Things weren't going perfect for Kida though. He couldn't decide whether to go in or not. He didn't feel like he had enough confidence in his plan, so he just paced outside the door that lead to his favorite place, containing his favorite person. But as the door slowly creaked open, Kida froze in place. The inside of the apartment was dark, but he could faintly make out that devilish grin that the red-eyed man always wore. Kida shuddered.

He stepped toward the room, his nerves trying to get to him. But Kida shook them off. He didn't want to back out now. He couldn't! Not after he had worried this much. He wouldn't be able to deal with the disappointment he would have in himself if he didn't go through with this. And with this, he crossed the threshold.

As he advanced farther into the information broker's apartment, he noticed the crooked grin begin to move. He stood still for a second, following the man with his eyes, until he disappeared through another door. _Where is Orihara-san going?_ Kida was falling into the man's trap.

He took small but sure steps after the man, trying to figure out, with his memory of the apartment's layout, what room Orihara had slipped into. If he was correct, it would be an empty room, with just a lone desk. He opened the door, and after letting his eyes adjust to the darkness and looking around a bit, felt slightly proud of himself for correctly figuring out which room it was.

"My my Masaomi-kun~" Kida's head snapped back toward the door to the room which was now closed. He stared for a second, before his head snapped in another direction, following the information broker's teasing voice. "I didn't expect you to come to me today!"

Kida suddenly felt like he was being engulfed by the darkness, as slender arms wrapped around his small frame. Orihara brought his mouth next to Kida's left ear, and with the next sentence that escaped his poisonous lips, Kida was thrown over the edge.

"I love you, _Masaomi_."

A small smirk crept onto his face. He knew that Orihara's words were not true. He knew that they would never be true. No matter what he did for the red-eyed man, he could never get him to return his love. But that was just the kind of man Orihara Izaya was. As an observer of all, he himself loved humans, but in return, humans could not love him himself. That was the twisted way that Orihara had explained it to the boy, after the first time they had had sex. Kida had argued that he in fact _did_ love the man, but the man was too smart for him, and distorted every word Kida had said to his own advantage.

His one wish, besides wanting Orihara Izaya to return his love, was for Orihara Izaya to _recognize_ that Kida Masaomi loved him. Even that would be enough. "Orihara-san.. I-"

He was cut off by a jolt that struck throughout his body, making every part of him tingle. The cause of this stimulating sensation was in fact Orihara, who had taken the liberty of tracing up and down Kida's neck with his wet tongue. Kida instantly wished he had had the ability to resist getting weak after the slightest touches from the man. But he had no such ability, as shown by the soft moan that slipped out from his lips as Orihara bit down slightly on a particularly _sensitive_ spot on his neck.

_Damn.. He knows all of my weak spots. _Maybe this would be a factor acting towards why Orihara would get bored with him. Orihara Izaya knew Kida's body like the back of his hand, and maybe the lack of surprise, as in finding a new spot that caused Kida to moan louder, would eventually bore the older man. Kida's head drooped down. He hadn't realized though, that this gave Orihara more access to the silky smooth skin on his neck. When he did realize, it was a little too late.

Teeth marks were all over the back of his neck, blood streaming out of a few places. And the only sound in the air was that of Kida Masaomi's unsteady moans. Orihara took a notably deep bite into Kida's flesh, before backing away to marvel at what he had created. Kida's face was completely flushed, and his neck matched. And as he kept an unstable breathing patter, it was obvious to Orihara that Kida was already very turned on.

As soon as he felt a hand moving toward his belt, Kida knew that he had no act now. It was now or never, and he had to choose now. Very suddenly, Kida grabbed Orihara's hand and pushed him toward the ground, toppling over with him, but landing steadily on top of the older man. This was a complete first for Kida. He had Orihara Izaya pinned to the floor. Orihara just grinned.

"My my Masaomi-kun. I didn't think you could be this bold."

_Crap. He's teasing me. _Kida still couldn't fully grasp what exactly it was that he was trying to do, but he had to act quickly, or Orihara would gain the upper hand once again, as always.

"Sh-Shut up, Orihara-san." He couldn't help but stutter as he spoke, for this was probably the most embarrassed he had ever felt in his entire life. Nothing could match up to the moment where he had topped Orihara Izaya. Well, he hadn't exactly _topped_ the man yet, but he sure as hell planned to. "Tonight.. I'm in charge!"

"Why this sudden character change, _hm_?" Orihara was chuckling. And though that was nothing new, Kida didn't like it one bit at this moment. He didn't want the man so uninterested that he had time to chuckle to himself. No, he wanted Orihara Izaya's _full attention_. And he'd gain it.

"Orihara-san, tonight you will just be sitting back and letting me do the work!" Kida hadn't noticed that he had raised his voice. His nerves _were _getting to him, no matter how much he tried to deny it.

"Masaomi, Masaomi~" He teased. "Do you really think you can accomplish this silly goal of yours?"

Kida leaned down over the black-haired man, and their lips met softly. _Craaap... this is the first time _I've _kissed _him_! _Kida was panicking slightly on the inside. But he had to prove Orihara wrong. He could do this!

He pressed his lips more against the older man's, after feeling his lips curl into a grin. He would _not_ lose to Orihara Izaya this time. As he slowly slipped his tongue out from his own mouth to probe the others, his once tense body began to calm, and slip into the thick blanket of euphoria that was covering himself and Orihara.

Orihara was surprisingly welcoming of Kida's new-found boldness. He simply allowed the younger boy's tongue to delve into that which was the wonders of Orihara Izaya, while his tongue just glided after. While Orihara was quite calm and collected, Kida, on the other hand, was having much inner turmoil over this matter. _Am I doing this right? GOD, I feel like an idiot! Maybe I should quit while I still can..._

His mind blanked as he heard Izaya moan, and he couldn't help but fall into the estacitic feel of everything that was happening. He only realized now that he had begun grinding against the other male, who was also doing the same. Kida couldn't help but feel as if he was on top of the world at this moment.

He quickly separated his lips from Izaya's though, for he was gasping for air.

"Something wrong, _Ma-sa-o-mi_?"

_SHIT. _Izaya was now repositioning them, gaining back his role as the dominant male. While Kida was content that he had been able to last as long as he had as the dominant male, he couldn't help but wish he had gotten farther with the accepting Orihara. He brought shaky hands to the belt that held Orihara's pants in place.

"_Masaomi-kun_, what do you think you're doing~? Haven't you already had your turn?"

"Sh-Shut up, idiot! I should at least do _this much_!" Kida had undone Izaya's belt, but was too nervous to take the initiative once again and just, yank them down. Izaya picked up on his insecurities, and moved his own hands to _Kida's _belt, undoing it.

"Why don't we just do this together, _Masaomi_?" Both of them were now sitting upright, a notably short distance between them. Kida took one deep breath and looked into Orihara Izaya's eyes. His piercing red eyes. And with that, Kida Masaomi knew he was ready.

* * *

**WELL, looks like all the secks that y'all were looking forward to, will be coming in part 2. l'D … DON'T KILL ME!**


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